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A news item you may have heard hit very close to home last week. On Wednesday Feb., 13 U. S. Navy Special Operations Senior Chief Petty Officer Thomas J. Valentine died during a high-altitude/high-opening (HAHO) parachute training jump in
My family and I attended Tom’s funeral on Friday – held in the chapel and Naval Amphibious Base, Little Creek in Norfolk/VA Beach. The chapel, which holds about 800, including overflow, was standing-room only. The service itself was a primer on the leadership style of Tom Valentine. I have asked for a recording of the funeral so that I can take notes on it and develop some of the concepts for my own use. The first speaker was Tom’s squadron commander. The admiration with which he spoke of Tom said even more than his eloquent words. At a funeral you expect the eulogies to extol all the positive virtues of the deceased. Those who spoke about Tom, however, clearly exceeded that mandate because of the tremendous respect he engendered in all of them for the way he lived his life.
In spite of the tremendous demands that the life of a SEAL puts on family, Tom’s family came first, and they adored him. Christina has lost her best friend and the father of two children who made Tom’s eyes light up. Their son loved to get wind that Daddy was coming home and hide in a tree in their yard in order to ambush him.
Tom’s leadership philosophy can be summed up by the following question and answer:
“At what level are you willing to participate?” The only answer Tom could give is, “All in – all the time.” In Tom Valentine’s world something worth doing was only worth doing with his whole heart. His total commitment to everything he undertook characterized everything he ever did.
For those of you who only know about Navy SEALs from the way they are depicted in popular media, you would not recognize any of those caricatures in any of the SEALs I have ever met, let alone the ones I have seen this week. Tom in particular was as unpretentious and humble as you could ever expect a man to be. He would not talk about what he did unless you dragged it out of him. He had no need to grandstand. He had a family he loved more than life itself and a profession that allowed him to serve his country in the most direct means possible – by taking on our enemies face-to-face. What could be better?
As the testimonies demonstrated on Friday, few people have ever done it better than Senior Chief Tom Valentine. A family, the SEALs and our country have lost a man who was a hero to those we would call heroes.
Though the following words are mine, I think they describe how Tom lived, and a theme I wish to embody,
“The world will little note our words. May it, rather, mark our deeds and judge us worthy of emulation.”
2 comments:
dvdk....very appropriate post about Val. I had the honor and pleasure to know him for over 10 years. My brother served with Tom on the same Teams for that entire period. He was in the Honor Guard at the service at Little Creek and escorted Tom's mother to the gravesite the next week at Arlington. He recently returned from his umpteenth deployment to Afghanistan. I noted your mention of a request for a recording of the Memorial service. Were you able to get a copy? I too would like to get a copy. Val's friend 'Tofe' read an email at the service that was written by me. I would love to share the service with my kids, who were unable to attend. The email that Tom drafted that equated leadership with mountain climbing particularly sticks in my head. A few months ago my entire family revisited Tom's grave at Arlington in Section 60. Still hard to believe he's gone.
Rocketbb - Thanks for your note. I'm sorry to report that I didn't obtain an audio copy of the service. I, too, was at the gravesite at Arlington on perhaps the coldest day of last winter. Wish I had more for you. As you might be able to tell I haven't posted recently on this blog - too busy with the "day job."
"A man worth emulating will never be lost, for his character resides in those whom he impacted, and will echo through time by way their progeny."
- dvdk
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